Every Winner Has Scars

As a victim of circumstances, for a very long time I believed hard luck chased me. From marks in school, to college competitions, I always had a feeling of being a “loser”. It was not like I didn’t work hard, but something bizarre always used to block my way. Captain Gopinath in his autobiography “Simply Fly” has described a phrase ‘chance events’- those decisions which have power to dictate our lives. But unfortunately my each chance event used to turn out to be a horrible disaster. Further in life some heart shattering incidents where trust was broken, faith was questioned, truth was beaten by lie made me lose faith in god. I refused to enter the arenas where my fear of being a loser would nag me.

One day I bumped into my college teacher in an Italian café. I remember how she was always proud of my undaunted spirit to strive hard and move up in life. She taught me for a year and a half, but there was an unspeakable bond from my end for her and a certain level of respect I used to see in her eyes for myself. She was shocked at my sappy behavior at the cafe but didn’t react much. I read many questions in her eyes which I ignored to answer. We exchanged numbers and parted our ways.


On her 50th Birthday she invited me for a cup of coffee at her place. I still remember how uncomfortable I was, just wanted to run away from her living room. After some vivid conversations about those good old days and extreme climate of North India she finally spilled her heart out freely. She judged from my attitude about my hard line approach towards my fear of being a loser. She didn’t ask me anything like others, “why you are acting like a chicken?”, “why you are afraid of taking risk?”, “why this or why that?”. She knew if I would have had these answers I wouldn’t be behaving so cruelly with myself. She said calmly while poring the coffee in the cup, “you know, often life throws curve balls and force us to pose the question “Why Me”? We might won’t get the answer that moment but one day time will teach us that nothing in the world is ever completely useless. Perhaps the time when it goes wrong is teaching us something. There is providence in the fall of a sparrow even.” I found a palpable sense of concern in her words. Reluctantly I said, “Time has taught me I am a loser. Its better I should accept the fact sooner and try to find a new path which can correspond to my winning abilities.”

She remained quite for a while, and that silence obviously didn’t mean consent. And then she dropped few thought provoking words which are indelibly the ground breaking reality for people like me who feels the same at certain point in life. She looked at me and said “Sweetheart, sometimes we don’t understand why god wants us to fight for things which we could have got easily or say we deserve them. Trust me often you won’t discover the significance of that fight also.” Suddenly I asked those prohibited words “why me”? She continued with a smile “In life one needs either inspiration or desperation for being a winner. When we start our journey we need to have sufficient courage to commit errors, face defeats, disappointments and despair. Pitiful is the person who is afraid of moving ahead in life in the fear of dashing his hopes. This attitude won’t ever let him recognize the talents god bestowed on him”. I got my lesson!

Today I am a different person warts and all. I dare to undertake the uncertain voyage of facing my fears to shape my destiny. And those defeats have actually made me realize the real taste of success.

Dare to Dream!

T.E. Lawrence once said, 'All men dream: but not equally.'
People who don't have a dream, only have choice of traps.

You've got to figure out what you really want and follow that passionately. You are 'special' to this cosmos because 'you' have the courage to pass through inevitable obstacles and some soul shattering failures, followed by cynicism and criticism. And again its only 'you' who has got invariable energy to continue the undertaken journey.

Your willingness to commit yourself to this dream by not letting your presistance to be dampened by discouragement & your hard work without despair shall make you achieve the impossible. It is relentless pressure that creates a crack. So, if you decide not to give up till your dream comes true, there's nothing that can stop you from achieving it.

Quoting George Bernard Shaw "You see things, and you say 'WHY', but I dream things that never were, and I say, 'WHY NOT'?